April 21, 2009

God bless America.

Ahhh!!!!

Money money money! I seem to be running out of cash all the time and I am getting increasingly nearer to becoming a bankrupt! My Noble $2 Chicken Rice Operation is a really effective money saving scheme but eating 10 packets of it every week is seriously no joke. Remember how we use to count ourselves lucky for not being enlisted into Commandos training? My Chicken Rice Operation is equally, if not, tougher than the Men of Steel with the Crimson Beret.

Two packets (one for breakfast and lunch) for Monday is cool, the Chicken Rice tastes fantastic. Two packets for Tuesday and you start to feel so-so but the Chicken Rice is still edible. Two more for Wednesday and you feel like you are in deja vu, wondering what you have been eating for the past two days. Come Thursday you will start to doubt your memory and wonder if your taste buds have been programmed by default to taste chicken rice only. Another two more for the next day and you wished you NEVER thank god for Friday. Come next Monday, you will be on your way to the hospital for gastric lavage.

If you are strong enough to endure through this operation for 3 weeks, you will contract Avian Flu and die. Only in very rare cases will there be people who can last more than 3 weeks; these people are usually abnormal and they are most probably on their way to evolving into a Chickman species. I have never actually seen one before but hey, the world is big and there are infinite possibilities. Do let me know if anyone of you ever witness this Chickman species.

And no, don't look at me. No doubt I may be the creator of this Noble Operation but even the great I can only last through 2 weeks tops. I wonder if there are any better ways to save money. Perhaps I should try eating French Loaves instead! I might be able to evolve into a Frenchman!!! On second thought, I think I am fine the way I am.

I have been chewing my food with the right side of my mouth for the past week because this homeless ulcer from somewhere decided to set up its humble abode inside my left mouth. Although the ulcer is disappearing, my right side has been sore with all the extra chewing that it seems to be growing another ulcer again. Never mind.

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